I am an artist. But I don't work as one in real life. This leads to some Melancholy at times. I was not made for the cubicle life. Interestingly enough, as an "outsider" working in this environment I have discovered that there are actually peopel that thrive here. It's so very alien to me that this would be a desirable place for someone to be - but I have found that it takes all kinds - and I am grateful that there are people that truly do belong here. ---You may ask, why are you working in this environment, when it is the polar opposite of who you are? I answer: security. This is how I pay the bills - the money is regular - if somewhat reduced from what I would like to be making. I do my art professionally on the side, but I have not yet come into the client base that would allow total emancipation. In my experience there are a lot of people in this world not working the job that they would like. When I read about men I look up to for the worldly things they have accomplished, I see that they have taken risks that I am not willing to take. I also see lives that are missing out on spiritual things of importance that I would never give up. If I change my focus to other men to which I Admire for their Spiritual Giantism, I see that they have lost their own lives in the lives of others and I desire to be like that.
I am not a depressed person because of the Spiritual aspect of my life. Therin lies true joy. I will however seek to detach myself from the Cubicle. But more importantly, I will seek to improve myself spiritualy. I must lose my life in order to find it.